Phoenix = Friend
RMP = Random Male Player
[Phoenix and I are having a discussion about our friend Dave (aka Spartan) not talking in the lobby]
Phoenix: You’re not speaking.
Me: Who? Dave?
Phoenix: [phone goes off] Unless that’s you texting me.
Me: Mic is broken!
Phoenix: It is.
Me: Is it really?
Phoenix: ‘No mic right now’. ‘No mic right now’.
RMP2: [heavily accented] Hey, Jenny, you suck my big dick?
Me: [barely suppressed laughter]
Phoenix: That’s the best you’ve come up with?
RMP2: Hey baby- [cuts off as game begins]